Oh, I see what you're saying. The "OMG B/A 4evah!!!!!!!!" side of me naturally disagrees, but you're absolutely right about canon not necessarily showing them--or even giving them a chance--to have a serious relationship in which they know each other completely and love each other in a real way for that knowledge. That makes sense and makes what you say about Angelus not loving Buffy make a lot of sense, too.

Though I do feel the need to point out that Angelus treated Buffy differently than Darla because their orientation (insofar as "good" or "evil") did mean something to him, quite a bit. I just prefer to believe he still loved Buffy's strength, determination, etc, but I can freely admit that's my personal fanwank on it. ;o)