lettered | your under-loved fic/art

Crossposts: http://lettered.livejournal.com/166166.html

your under-loved fic/art

The AO3 stats meme is going around. I love this meme because people talk about their stories and their readership(s). I always sound like I'm whining when I talk about readership, but sometimes I really just want to make observations about why people read the things they do. Also, apparently I don't like to do memes I just like to do meta on memes. So here we go!

Please comment to this post with a link to a fic/art/meta you're really proud of having created, that hasn't received the attention you felt it deserved. Tell us what the story/art/meta is about, what you really liked about it, and tell us why you think it didn't get as many hits/kudos/comments/replies/recs/etc as you'd secretly hoped.

I'm not promising to read your story/meta/look at your art, because I might not have time, but I find this interesting and cathartic to talk about. If you are not a writer/artist, comment with a fic you like that you wish had gotten more love. Please feel free to direct people to this post so that they can share the fic they're proud of and discuss things like readership.

ETA: The fic doesn't have to be on AO3. Also, the hit/kudos/comment/whatever count doesn't have to be low. For instance, the fic I have that feels under-appreciated got a lot of nice comments and nice attention. I still feel sad that it didn't really get the wide readership I feel it deserves. This is your place to talk about that without feeling self-conscious about wishing something got more attention.

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This is harder than I thought because when I look at AO3, most of my lower-hit-count stories are ones I originally posted elsewhere (mostly Buffyverse) and most of those probably got plenty of comments way back when (when the fandoms were more active.) And then others are pre-AO3 Yuletide, and Yuletide feedback patterns are notoriously random --

But I guess of my Yuletide fics, I've always preferred the second-most-popular of my Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid stories, Clandestine. ie, the one without any porn. And while I like the porn-y one, I really enjoy the dynamic among Butch & Sundance & Etta in "Clandestine" -- which I think stands on its own pretty well, even if you don't know the movie (though adding young Newman & Redford to one's imaginings never hurt.) I partly wrote this because I couldn't find any other fics written in Sundance's POV, and his grouchy head is one of my favorite that I've ever crawled into -- and one that came so naturally to me, it felt like magic.

Idk, the stories whose responses I feel most disappointed about don't have low hit counts. They're just lower than I wanted. Sometimes you write a story and post it not expecting much of a response. It doesn't get much of a response and that's okay. Or it gets a huge response and you're pleased and kind of overwhelmed. Other times, you write a story and really think that people will like it, that it's something a lot of people will enjoy and maybe even rec. Then that happens and you're pleased and proud and essentially very chuffed. Or it doesn't happened and you're kind of crushed, and you remonstrate with yourself, because you shouldn't have had those big-headed thoughts about how many people would love your story. It's the latter circumstance about which I wanted to talk. The three fics whose response has been most disappointing to me are also fics that have gotten quite a lot of attention, but they didn't get as much attention as some of my other fics that I don't think are as good, and they didn't get as much attention as some other fics by other people, and they didn't get the attention I wanted.

...It's really petty so most people don't talk about it, but I think it's alright as long as we all understand that our responses are really emotional and not always logical, and that it's not okay to say, "But that fic sucks and mine is brilliant so more people should be commenting on mine!"

Oh man, I was just talking about Butch Cassidy the other day. I haven't watched it since I was 9 or something and I didn't like it then, and I was talking about how I wanted to rewatch it since I'd probably have a different opinion now! I'll try to keep your fic in mind for after my rewatch!

That's a very yuletide feeling, sometimes!

Anyway, you should rewatch BC&SK it is actually pretty amazing.

Well, once upon a time I decided that the Buffyverse deserved an epic poem. Three years and fifty-thousand words of iambic pentameter later, I had something I was happy to call finished, though possibly only three-five readers max. :( People seemed to like the concept when I started, but basically I think it was like I pushed a gimmick waaaaaaay beyond the initial novelty value people were willing to read it for (even though for me it was never a gimmick but my very favourite narrative medium). It was really kind of a blow, because it's not even that Spuffy in the end (certainly not enough, I don't think, to put off the gen/concept people, if any of them still really read Buffyverse stuff) and while there are (IIRC) a few rushed transitions, it was the first time I managed to draw together a plot longer than 20K words and I love Illyria's story in it. In general I think it's quite good. To be honest, I'm not sure I've ever quite recovered from working that hard on something and posting it for 0-1-2 initial comments - but I don't blame anyone for that. Sometimes fandom and me just don't click on these things.

Edited 2013-04-23 22:15 (UTC)

I imagine it intimidated a lot of people? I always wanted to read it, but things that I think might make me think too hard get put on a shelf for when I have the time and am in the mood, and sometimes I forget they're there. I know that this is not really comforting to you, but anyway I've been reading Mrs. Dalloway for approximately three years; every time I go back to it I read about 400 words and have to stop and think for days, and then I feel overwhelmed and don't go back to it. When I think that that might happen to me (even with fanfic; there's quite a bit of fanfic that is extremely thought provoking!) sometimes I just get discouraged. This is a nice reminder though, since I love the idea of this story and stultiloquentia praises it to the skies :o)

I did get some feedback from someone (who was reading it as part of a concrit cicle) that they found it intimidating... But that once they got started it was OK? (She says only to report the anecdote, with no wish to apply any pressure at all!!!) I know exactly what you mean about intimidating reads, though, and can see why anyone would put off starting - I suppose I'm just not sure what to do to make it more inviting, or how you make any long thing more inviting. I always feel like I'm on a similar knife-edge with longfic - I can't work out whether people don't want to start reading unless they know the ending's there and they won't have to wait for it to be posted, but then no one goes 'ooh, 50K+ words; I'll get started on that over my toast'. My problem, I think, is that I do both of these things readily, at the same time as willingly going through any number of click-throughs to find fic, or putting up with bad grammar in the first chapter if the story has potential... I don't know how to relate to my fandom/readership a lot of the time, because it sometimes feels as if people genuinely just aren't that interested in fic anymore. (The LJ fic culture I remember for the Buffyverse still seems to be alive on certain archives, I should say, but I've never really found my groove with them, mostly because of the fear that I forget to be Spuffy enough.)

I have to say, I appreciate these occasional invitations you issue to whine about my readership. Usually I'd feel weird and self-conscious about it, but since you ask... :)

Moving into SPN fandom has been one long lesson in adjusting my expectations; I went from writing the fandom's favorite character and ship back in a fairly tight-knit community to writing rare pairs and minor character gen in a huge sprawling fandom. So, I am of the firm and entitled belief that like 3/4 of my SPN and SPN RPF fics deserve more attention than they got.

That said, I'll point to the same one I've mentioned on my blog before, Who Favor Fire, which is Sam/Tamara set in late season 5. Tamara's the British hunter in 3.01 whose husband is killed by demons, and the fic is about her coming back to the States to kill Lucifer and lay some of her metaphorical demons to rest or die trying (which she wouldn't necessarily mind). Sam, meanwhile, wants to fix his S4 mistake or die trying. That was one of those careful fics, to use your words, where I spent a lot of time working out the emotions for myself before I finally got them down on paper. I even got it Brit-picked. I think I did a kickass job fleshing out a minor character and giving her her own story while also showing where Sam's head was at the time, and it's short but really dense, and I am super proud of it.

And it got three comments, because, I think, it's minor character het. Those three comments were very appreciative comments, but still.

(I have this problem these days where I'm starting to weight the value of my work according to whether I think people will want to read it. I still write a lot of rare characters and het ships, and it's not like I'm going to change my habits, but I have this abiding conviction that my fic couldn't possibly be "worth" as much as stuff that lots of people read and comment on. Which is blatant untruth, and I know it, but it still feels true. /woe is me)

Usually I'd feel weird and self-conscious about it

As I said to someone above, it's really petty so most people don't talk about it, but I think it's alright as long as we all understand that our responses are really emotional and not always logical. It's not okay to say, "But that fic sucks and mine is brilliant so more people should be commenting on mine!" But it's okay to feel that your fic didn't get the appreciation it deserved, and I think it's an appropriate thing to discuss if we do so in a rational manner in a space where we're all of an understanding. The idea that a large percentage of the fannish population all feels the same way but shouldn't talk about it seems silly.

I have this abiding conviction that my fic couldn't possibly be "worth" as much as stuff that lots of people read and comment on.

I think a lot of us feel that way. Almost everything I wrote last year was gen, and while it got a lot of appreciation, it didn't get nearly the response shippy fic in the same fandom is getting. And I'm afraid that's the reason I'm in such a slump right now. Which is ridiculous, but I'm having trouble getting over it.

minor character het

I feel like minor character het is even below gen on the totem pole, insofar as what readers are gonna pay attention to. And that makes me sad.

Better comment later, but in the meantime would you mind if I repost the gist of this on my blog as a meme kind of thing?

nope, no problem :o)

Almost everything I wrote last year was gen, and while it got a lot of appreciation, it didn't get nearly the response shippy fic in the same fandom is getting. And I'm afraid that's the reason I'm in such a slump right now. Which is ridiculous, but I'm having trouble getting over it.

Aw. :( I am very sorry to hear that. Last year you wrote The Chuck Writes Story, didn't you? And that was amazing. (Which reminds me, I totally have to rec that at rocksalt_recs when I handle genfic next month.) And I enjoyed your Bruce&Natasha fic quite a bit, although my interest in Avengers things kind of petered out shortly afterwards, alas.

"THE Woman" is a Sherlock/Schrodinger's Heroes crossover about getting shafted by Irene Adler. It got good feedback on DW but not much attention on AO3. I find that my crossovers often do better on DW and straight-up fanfic or single-series stuff on AO3.

I wonder if that has to do with the functions of those different sites. I mean, if you're on AO3, you're there to read fic, and a lot of times, you're there to read specific fandoms/ships. Sometimes you're there to read a specific author, but if I'm into a specific author, I'm more likely to just friend them on their blog than subscribe to them on the archive. I wonder why that is? But anyway, on DW you're more likely to have people on your list who are into both fandoms. Anyway, it's interesting!

>> I wonder if that has to do with the functions of those different sites. <<

It seems to, yes. On AO3 I may pick up new readers, because I've written something that matches their fave; and then they think, "Wow, this is awesome, I wonder if this author has anything else?" On DW I have people who just plain like what I write, though they might have favorite subcategories within that; and sometimes I'll hook them on totally new material. I've sold Avengers canon with my fanfic, for instance.

One thing unique about AO3 is its high permeability. Usually it's all but impossible to get people to follow me from one venue to another, but I've picked up a handful or two from AO3 to DW. Trouble is, AO3 is downright pissy about interconnectivity, which makes it a much less useful site for me personally.

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