lettered | Big ole hug

I know what you mean. I have the first BtVS CD and the Angel CD in my office, and I was listening to them last week. Now, I'm wanting to hear the Angel "judgment" music, and it's in the damned office!!!

I miss my dead gay show and I also miss BtVS. But, I miss my dead gay show, more.

Now, I'm all verklempt.

Talk amongst yourselves....

I miss BtVS, but a. the music makes me also want to dance, and b. it got an ending.

I, too, am overcome with emotion. And that feeling, just before you cry, that kind of smells like rain in your head? I FEEL THAT.

Don't cry. Or if you must cry, share the ice cream of comfort, yes?

I am OUT of ice cream, which is bad enough, and THEN there is that icon of yours, which does not help at ALL.

JEEZ!

:o)

Uhm.., I was trying to cheer you up with the icon! How bout this one?

That show, that show was CANCELLED.

But no one would have the BALLS to cancel VK's cock.

I don't care if that doesn't make sense; it's strangely uplifting.

Uplifting. Heh.

I just thought about that.

Anyway, thanks. *sings songs about you you wouldn't want to hear, but they are flattering songs, I promise, and they have sea creatures and stars in them!*

*flings self into your arms* Dude, I still have 16 episodes of a virtual season on my to-do list; I ain't goin' nowhere.

*squashes you to my bosom*

*and my bosoms!*

Is it just me, or are there a lot of people up and quitting fandom?

Ahahaha. I will be there with you, always, in every pr0n fic you write and tale you tell. *hugs you hard*

I was so sad to hear you weren't going to be around lj any more. I mean, I want you to do what's best for you, but I will miss you! I hope life shapes up and my thoughts and porny love vibes are with you!

*hugs back* sorry if I get snot on your shoulder.

*smooches you* It's life, babe, and I've finally reached a fork in the road, and despite however way I look at it, both paths call for a change. This is the only way I see how of moving forward, I hope you understand. I'm thrilled to have met you. :)

Of course I understand. I don't mean to seem all clingy and how could you do this?! when you're just doing what you need. I'll just miss you, that's all! I'm glad I met you too!

I do hope you spread your wings and hop very hard wherever life takes you. Like a duck. Because ducks are way cooler than a soaring geese like things. Geese hiss! (((HUGS YOU AGAIN!)))

Is it just me, or are there a lot of people up and quitting fandom?

Poo.

It's not just you.

*sigh*

Yes! AND VK WILL ALWAYS BE PRETTYYYYY!

*squishes you*

I love the Angel theme song too, it makes me happy every time I hear it, except for when it makes me cry.

Dude, I was in the middle of exercising and starting crying during a Buffy episode (The Freshman) when Xander tells Buffy that she's his hero.

*clings to fandom*

I know what you mean. If it helps I have no intention of going anywhere. I may not be making much fanish noise at the moment but I'm still in love with my dead gay shows ::hugs::

and witty and GAYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!

The BtVS theme song makes me happy with a tinge of sadness. I mean, it makes me HAPPY. I dance. I head bang. I jump up and down. I feel sad that I watched 'em all and there won't be any more, that Angel left and Buffy loses so much and Willow tasted murder and Xander lost an eye, but it still really revs me up.

But the AtS one just...kills me.

Dude, these were some good shows. I know we all know that here? But sometimes I sit back and get startled about how good they were. And when things are shitty in RL I think about how good they are and it makes me happy but also sad. But it's kind of a good kind of sad. Like a chocolate good cry don't mind being alone on a Friday night because you're going to order pizza and watch your favorite show kind of sad.

*snuggles*

The thing is, I fandom hop. I used to be a big fandom hopper. But most of my obsessions, once obsessed, I stay obsessed, and once in a fandom, I always come *back* to it. I get very intensely obsessed with something for a very *short* amoung of time, then I lay off, then I come back. And since getting hooked on Jossverse, I've totally hopped in and out and back again. I haven't gotten CRAZY over another fandom since I've been in this one, but I know even if I did, I'd totally come back here just as intense as before. It's cyclical with me. But so many people who're around here, and say they're leaving, it feels so . . . *final*. And if there's one thing I do have experience with, it's old dead fandoms, in which no one is interested any more, except me being utterly obsessed with it and having no one to talk to over it.

Dude, so completely rambling because it's like 4am. I'm glad you're not going anywhere. *builds a fire in the hearth and serves you hazelnut hot chocolate. With melty marshmellows.*

That was weird. For a second there I thought you were gonna say, "I wish I knew how to quit you!!"

Ehem.

And yes, the Angel theme does rock hard. Gives me shivers every time.

Dude, so completely rambling because it's like 4am. I'm glad you're not going anywhere. *builds a fire in the hearth and serves you hazelnut hot chocolate. With melty marshmellows.*

Aww. See this is the best ::snuggles you back::

Is it weird that sometimes I have an urge to cling to Jossverse fandom's broad manly chest while crying "There's not enogh time, not enough time. I'll never forget!" Um, okay, just me then...

I've been thinking about fandoms and shows and what makes me love them. Since BtVS, and Ats and Firefly bit the dust I have enjoyed other shows, but I'm not passionate about them in that special, tingly, obsessive way. I like 'House,' it's a great show but it doesn't make me want to write fic. I've missed most of 'Lost,' so couldn't really say if I'd have loved it. 'Doctor who,' is fine, but it just doesn't hit my emotional kinks. 'Oz,' well, I'd like to see more because Beecher and Keller have that whole Buffy/Faith vibe going on, but that's exactly it, I'd rather just have more B/F. As for BSG, I finally caught the fandom bandwagon, and I love the show, but I don't *LOVE* it. I especially love Starbuck, the character practically has lesbian icon tattood on her, but the first thing i thought was, wouldn't it be interesting to see what would happen if she met Faith, they could drink too much whiskey, and stoically not talk about their screwed up childhoods, at some point there would probably be fighting...

Er, anyway, my point was that no other shows have done to me what those Jossverse shows and characters do to me. I have a secret fear that someday a show will come along and sweep me off my feet and I won't be in love with them any more, but so far that hasn't happened, and even if it did, in my heart of hearts I know I'd come back.

Yesterday, a re-run of 'Passion' was on and I was watching it with a friend. He turned to me half way through and said, 'y'know, I don't think I ever see you looking as happy as when you're watching Buffy.' And it's probably true.

Aww. I'm sorry there's sadness over people leaving. :( For me, one of the saddest fandom thingies is to see that line through someone's LJ name, even if all I know about the person is "I liked that one fic they wrote that one time."

But there are still tons of us who aren't going anywhere!

And, man, do I love the Angel theme song. It doesn't make me cry, because I listen to it all the time and crying that much would be exhausting. But it's very pretty.

For as long as people want to write good BtVS/AtS fic, I'll be around to read it. I don't change easily, I'm a stick-in-the-mud kind of person. Comes of all that moving around that I did as a kid; it made me like to settle in and be solidly in one place!

(clings obsessively to fandom)

You make me wish I was *in* the fandom... *sniffle*

*makes love to fandom and gives birth to multiple little obsessed fandom babies* aka the remake of "Misery", where I hold Doug Petrie hostage and force him to write a Faith movie in which her and Xander snuggle - at least, after the angry sex and stuff.

*will pay lots of cash for the pre-sunnydale faith novel 'go ask malice'. faith = love. LOVE.*

i loooove fandom. to prove this, i like... set up a goal for me to make 100 icons before this coming Wednesday 'cause I've never reached that before and I'm jealous of the people who CAN, and I started the other day... and finished them today. and posted them. You should go look (http://43100.livejournal.com/29019.html). *snickers*

:o)

*clings*

Is it weird that sometimes I have an urge to cling to Jossverse fandom's broad manly chest while crying "There's not enogh time, not enough time. I'll never forget!" Um, okay, just me then...

HAHAHA! Not just you!

I don't think I've ever been in love with another fandom quite the way I am with Jossverse, but there've been others (movies and books, mostly. Most TV shows do nothing for me. Which is why I rarely watch TV. Which is also partly why Jossverse holds me tighter; there's so much MORE material in it than in most of the movies and books I've been obsessed with, no matter how long).

Is it weird that sometimes I have an urge to cling to Jossverse fandom's broad manly chest while crying "There's not enogh time, not enough time. I'll never forget!" Um, okay, just me then...

Well, like I said, with the way I am, I know it'll most likely WILL happen. And I know I WILL come back! Dude, I'll still be reading fanfic for it when I'm 93.

y'know, I don't think I ever see you looking as happy as when you're watching Buffy.' And it's probably true.

Awww. *glomps you*

For a second there I thought you were gonna say, "I wish I knew how to quit you!!"

I should've! Except no wait. I don't want to quit. I want to make clandestine gay cowboy love to it forver and ever.

For me, one of the saddest fandom thingies is to see that line through someone's LJ name, even if all I know about the person is "I liked that one fic they wrote that one time."

I know! Sometimes I even don't know that much! And am still so sorry to see them leave!

And, man, do I love the Angel theme song. It doesn't make me cry, because I listen to it all the time and crying that much would be exhausting.

Ha. Well, I don't actually watch the shows that much. I'm afraid I'll get tired of them. So I save them for a treat, something special when I'm low and such. Maybe that's why it made me cry!

You're not a stick in the mud, you're a tree in FERTILE SOIL with flowers growing all around and wet lucious little earthworms and dandelions swaying gently in the wind so they bump up against you and I AM A VINE CLINGING TO YOU.

*shouts to the invisible forces of ...I don't know, but I'm shoutin' at 'em: "That's one you're not gonna get!"*

Ah, but you are fannish, which makes me happy.

Please don't say the party's over! I just got here!

Actually, that's not true. I've been lurking for a year, but your post made me feel guilty for not standing up and being counted. People should do lurker days on their LJ's when they ask lurkers to sign in. It could give you a head count of how many people are really reading your journal. Could be a cheering number; and then again, you might find out there are only two lurkers hanging around your LJ like Ghost Dennis.

Slipping back into lurk mode... And yes, the music does give rise to crushing nostalgia.

*makes love to fandom and gives birth to multiple little obsessed fandom babies*

*eats the babies*

go ask malice

Nice title!

I love your icons!

omg, *clings back!*

..................................................................................................

You just ate my babies. :/

And yeah, "Go Ask Malice". Clearly, titled after "Go Ask Alice", but at least this one's obvious about being fake!

OMG HI! Hi hi hi!

I understand lurking, really, I do, but it's so nice to meet new people! So hi!

A couple months back there was a meme going around; you posted something in your journal and asked the lurkers to say hi. I didn't do it because I didn't think anyone lurked on my journal, and because if anyone did I thought they'd say hi if they wanted, you know? But, speaking just for yourself, would you rather be encouraged by someone to participate in fandom, or would you rather just be left alone?

I'm asking because I've been in lots of fandoms before, and I've always found it very hard to start up in a fandom, to get to know people and feel like you're one of those people whose fanfic people read and such. And because I've had such a sucky past with it I've been really thinking about starting a comm for newbies, where newbies all go and introduce themselves to each other, but also do stuff like post the fanfic they feel all weird about because it's their first ever and they're afraid they won't get fb, and also do stuff like discuss "how to get noticed in fandom." Not like I have all the answers, but discussion is good.

But the reason I haven't moved on the comm is because a. I find it hard to find new people, and b. do new people really *want* that kind of support system? Myself, when I was really new, I'd've blown it off. Well, I would've looked at it longingly, and thought, "I am too new and inexperienced to even join that comm." Anyway a comm like that might be one way to keep fandom vigorous because maybe more new people would join.

OMG I'm sorry I'm rambling. You bravely ventured forth from lurkdom and I like dumped all fandom woes at your feet and tried to make you carry them in a bag with holes in it and strange worms eating it. But hi! I'm glad you commented! And I'm glad you love fandom! *shakes your hand*

I didn't do it! It was a dingo!

Because Faith is never ten feet tall. *nods knowingly*

I do! I am! (I talk like a parrot!)

Buffy fandom has always seemed unassailably huge to me. Too many characters, too many fans, too much! I can lurk and read but production seems out of my league.

Which is why I slave away in Phantomy obscurity, where at least I can see the edges.

But you don't have to take on BtVS fandom en masse! Start small, focusing on one character or pairing, post stuff to some of the major comms/lists whatever devoted to that character or pairing. People are STARVED for decent new writers in this fandom, and they will clutch you to their collective bosom and make meepy noises. Then you can branch out and become a BNF and people on that fist comm will sob in their beer remembering the days when you wrote Xander/Larry fic JUST FOR THEM.

Besides, compared to something like HP fandom, we're tiny. Tiny, cosy and accessible. You want to jump right in. You feel completely at ease...(uses hypnotic eye beams)

That's quite the pep talk. I'm flattered and somewhat flushed. I've been hoping for years that some "untold" story would pop into my brain and say "hey, write me! I'm about your favorite folks from Sunnydale!" But it hasn't.

But one of the biggest problems in my life is my propensity to try to figure out the big picture before I do anything, leading to vast acres of trepidation into which I dare not venture.

You have started me on the path of not thinking that way about BtVS.

So that's why you won't write me Xander/Larry, you nasty BNF! FLAME! FLAME!

:o)

You have started me on the path of not thinking that way about BtVS.

Dude, three cheers for

rahirah!

I was telling someone below, I've been wanting to start a comm, like a kinda newbie/introduction comm for Buffyverse, where new people can introduce themselves, post things they're afriad to post in other comms, and most importantly, discuss things like the fandom itself, it's issues, how to get noticed, how to get in, etc etc.

I really identify with what you're saying about the "big picture" . . . I don't just plunge into ANYTHING when it comes to interacting with people. I scope out for a LONG time before I join in ... I didn't do that with Buffyverse so much as with other fandoms, because I finally got fed up. I'd been in fandom for years, and felt like I didn't KNOW anybody, and I saw from the outside all these interesting discussions, beta relationships, forums for interaction, but I never felt like I could join in and the few times I did I felt ignored, and I'm SUCH an attention whore that this really affronted me. I think I got lucky with Jossverse because I met some people who really in the thick of it right off the bat, and they were all incredibly kind to me, but...five years of fandom, and that never happened before.

I don't know, I just don't want other people to feel like I've felt before, wanting to join in and feeling all weirdly left out, and feeling ridiculous for feeling left out because it would be easy to come in and make noise if I really wanted to.

So anyway, I do hope you get your bunny one day for Buffyverse. I love your Phantom fics though so you're not allowed to leave that fandom either or I will hunt you DOWN and stuff your stomach full of FLESH EATING RABBITS.

I so hear you. I just read the

su_herald's latest post and the quote at its top (which was from 'Origin'), and I got goosebumps.

Me? Not going anywhere. I squee about Bones, and I even dl 'Supernatural', but I don't think I'll ever find a show to fascinate and capture me as much as Angel did. I'm not over my dead gay show... not anywhere near it.

Tomorrow is our traditional weekly chronological Buffy-watching evening. This week on the menu: Prophecy Girl. :)

God, fandom is such crack! I won't leave Phantom; my "kissing the frog" gets recc'd still, so I feel I could get into a big fish/little pond situation, which is really attractive, y'know? But just so I know, are these rabbits going down my throat or is it a surgical procedure? Laproscopic, so to speak.

Smack me NOW.

It's not so much that I feel intimidated by Buffy fans or comms themselves--I'm brazen enough to post whatever I feel like whether invited or not--but the *writing* seems difficult. It can't be; much sillier people than I write all the time. But in my head it's like "OMG there's like 100,000 characters to think about and all this canon and argh!!" I'm so familiar with the Phantom stuff that if I even have to check a source I know where to look.

Everyone's so nice. =)

I just recently got a copy of the full length version of "Sanctuary" and can't stop listening to it. Cello rock is the thing - and damn, it was so perfect for that show.

I may have also made a totally indulgent Buffyverse mix with tons of music from the show or that reminds me of the show. No real thought into it, nothing I'd share, but it makes me freakin' happy.

ZOMG no one who is anyone writes Xander/Larry any longer! I AM ALL ABOUT LARRY/GIANTSNAKEWILKINS DO NOT FETTER MY FRAGILE MUSE!

Hi, and thanks for the handshake!

Re your idea of a newbie comm… if you’re thinking of one for BtVS/AtS fandom, I’m not sure it would work. The fandom is populated by people with such divergent interests that I’m not sure a newbie group would necessarily help fans gain entry into whatever subset of fandom scratches their itch. My own interest, for example, is pretty much limited to Spike, and also pretty much limited to fiction that engages in serious analysis of his character and that’s written to a high standard. To find people with common interests, I just need to know my way around LJ.

That said… yes, it does feel difficult to get started in fandom, and to get to know people. LJ, is seems to me, generates a thousand shallow interactions for every serious conversation. It has a cocktail party atmosphere that favors breeziness and wit over deeper discussion. LJ as a medium creates an incredible number of doors into fandom, but it also shapes fandom’s culture in ways that are not altogether hospitable to people who aren’t glibly gregarious or already steeped in fannish ways. Of course, that is a different concern from your interest in what can be done within the LJ setting to ease the way for new fans.

So, whether other fans would find a newbie comm helpful, I couldn’t say. Maybe it would be just the springboard into fandom that some need.

At any rate, thanks again for the friendly hello, and I’ll continue to lurk on your LJ. It’s certainly one of the more interesting ones around. Probably I’ll even post something again eventually.

I think you're right about the subset issues. That was one of the things that flummoxed me as well; most of the other fandoms I'd participated in before this one were either much smaller and without all these little sub groups, or were much more divided than even Jossverse is, and there was never this overall feel of interaction with people who's interests might be divergent from yours like you get here.

I know what you mean also about the difficulties of lj as a medium, but I'm not sure it's necessarily true that it doesn't favor those interested in deep discussion. I want to, and often do, use my own journal as a forum for fannish discussion, where we all really get into the meta of it (either of writing or canon or fandom itself), and for the most part I've had some fantastic results. People leave big long comments and sometimes we get into really interesting discussions in which we both learn a lot.

Thanks for your opinions, these are definitely big points to consider. And hi again, thanks for commenting, feel welcome to lurk and delurk as you please, and you won't find as much about Spike here as you might like, but you're always welcome in discussion!

Big ole hug

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