What is up?

[lettered]

Hello everyone. I haven't been on my journal in a while. I really miss you guys.

Lately I have: started yet another job, felt unwilling or unable to clean my room and keep up with laundry, failed at grazieprego, celebrated the release of Sarah Rees Brennen's book, The Demon's Lexicon here with sarahtales, orexisbella and all the cool marmalade fish (go read it; it's really good!). I have gained a new niece, not visited my cousin as much as I would like, angsted about Dreamwidth and how I'd like to move there but it seems like too much work. I have conceived a brilliant Buffyverse story, which awesomeness overwhelmed me for precisely 1.7 days, at which point I realized lynnenne had already written it and called it Vicarious. I have interviewed for new jobs and started learning about the stars, and become so addicted to caffeine that when I didn't have it this morning I pretty much felt the worst I've ever felt. I have failed to research making a website or ask about making one for marmalade_fish, failed to email seraphcelene whom I really miss, failed to stay in contact with lots of people who are important to me, but happily reconnected with some other people (like my best friends in Houston and my old room mate), started playing D&D, and discovered that even in the company of geeks I'm still geekier, because getting drunk off my ass and clubbing just never sounds that fun to me.

But mostly, it's been Star Trek. I have mainlined the Original Series, I have spent most evenings perusing the kink meme (st_xi_kink), I have posted over 7 prompts and filled 3, started filling approximately 5 more, have started at least 7 other fics besides those, and have written 25,000 words in the fandom without finishing any of it. I have read Nimoy's biography I Am Spock, listened to Shatner's albun Has Been at least three dozen times, obsessed for hours and hours with my_daroga, fallen in love with Bill Shatner, fallen in love with Shatner/Nimoy, but not quite as much as Kirk/Spock. I've posted anonymously for the first time in my life because my fanfiction confused me and my requests sort of overwhelmed me, and I've been so grateful that my_daroga feels similar to me because it has made me feel less weird, and because she's so clever and talented and insightful, and because I love her.

I have been waiting without much patience for the next chapter of this story, I have roleplayed ST characters in three different venues, I have read published and unpublished 70s K/S fanfiction, I've written and not posted probably about 5K worth of meta about Shatner, Kirk/Spock, and the role of women in ST and media. I've talked more about sex and probably more openly than I ever have in my life, I've fallen in love with space and sci fi, I appear to have lost all shame, and I signed up for a big bang. I've fallen in love with genderbending and tentacle sex, and last Saturday my_daroga, Mr. Daroga, and I drove all the way down to Portland to see the episode "Amok Time" performed live in a park by some dudes with bad costumes. I have actually not read that much ST fanfiction, because I've been too consumed by the kink meme, and how much there is, and confused about what is going on in ST fandom and where it is going on, and how to find any of it. I do not think I've figured in the fandom at all, I have met very few people in it, I've felt unable to post any of my fic or meta, and feel like I'm dancing the periphery of something I'd really like to be a part of, but feel too overwhelmed or self-conscious to really join.

I've felt overwhelming confusion about how to express all this on my livejournal, because despite the fact that long ago I stopped living and breathing Buffyverse, I still feel that's where I made most my friends, and I feel like talking about ST the way I did about BtVS would bore most people here, but going and meeting new people and trying to get them interested in me and being interested in them feels really intimidating because I'm shy in some ways, and anyway I still want to have things to say to the awesome people I already know here. But my flist is really overwhelming, and I don't know what's going on with anyone, and I really miss you all!

So, that's me. What's up with you? *puts chin in hands, ready to listen*

Comments

[imnotacommittee.livejournal.com]

I kind of have guy trouble and I became an aunt again. And oh yeah: Snape kicks ass.

And a SoM/Indy cross over keeps coming into my mind.

Star Trek!? I would have never thought you'd be a fan. What did you think of the movie?

[lynnenne]

I have gained a new niece

YAY! Nieces are the best invention EVER.

angsted about Dreamwidth and how I'd like to move there but it seems like too much work

Me, too.

I have conceived a brilliant Buffyverse story, which awesomeness overwhelmed me for precisely 1.7 days, at which point I realized lynnenne had already written it and called it Vicarious.

Write it anway, and call it the 1.7 Days Remix! Remixes from you are ALWAYS WELCOME. \0/

Yay for shiny new fandoms! I'm glad you're having such fun.

I got to visit with stoney321 last week, which totally pwnd the whole summer so far.

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

\o/ \o/

WHY IS THE DVD NOT OUT YET? *sobs*

[laliandra.livejournal.com]

A niece! How delightful!

Well, me, I have graduated from university and wore swishy Snape like robes. I have been to sunny beaches and written RPS on them. I have frequented the marmfish chatroom and written boomdeyada songs and been blamed for everything.

I met Sarah Rees Brennan! I watched HBP and wanted to write long sweeping H/D after reading Aja's nostalgia post.

And oh wow, I hear you about Star trek, because it's this huge place and I feel like the kink meme is sort of holding my hand into it. In a kinky way, obviously. And I am lurking on the edge only really reading things written by people I already know/stalk and I feel like I know too much to be written off as just a newbie but way, way not enough to be a Trekkie...

Anyway, oh GOD, I have written way more than I meant to. It is lovely to hear from you!

<3

[spuffyduds.livejournal.com]

Hi hi hiiiiiiii! So good to see you! I've been dabbling in ST myself!!! Hiiiiiiiiiii!

[tkp.livejournal.com]

...how do you know about my thing for Gaila?

*looks around, wild eyed*

[theantijoss.livejournal.com]

It's that piece of common brain we share! *creepy music*

I love, adore and worship STXI. But I'm all, "Yeah, and there's this awesome hot green chick named Gaila who almost smexes it up with that... um, Captain guy, oh Kirk! Right. James T. Kirk, but she's really got it bad for Uhura, who is awesome. Oh, and Spock Prime is in it. And the Hulk, who drives this like badass porcupine space ship through black holes and has rad tattoos on his face. And NO GAILA IS NOT DEAD -- SHE WAS TOTES ON THE ENTERPRISEOMGZ!"

So... geeky, but not quite Trekkie yet. ;)

You haven't been around, so you probably haven't seen teamgaila, where the greek chick lovers gather. We're doing a writing campaign to JJ so she totally won't be dead. *G*

GAILA RULES!

And just to prove that I'm not a TOTAL rude loser, congratulations on the niece! Is she green, because that would be cool.

[swmbo.livejournal.com]

Ohhh, grats on the new niece! I went and saw mine last weekend for the first time she's become a person (she's now 18 months) and I've decided nieces are 5 stars!

I have been throwing myself at one book after another :)

I feel you on the feeling-out-your-relationship-with-LJ. I say talk about what you're loving and just love the heck out of it.

[dovil.livejournal.com]

Good to see you about! And I get how you feel about LJ - I'm lazy and flounder and just post a lot and see what happends. Being proactive seems like way too much hard work. :D

[my_daroga]

I love you so much. I'm so glad I have you when you disappear. I'm getting mush in public about you.

Why do people ship us, what?

Anyway. Yes. I don't have anything to say. Except that.

And Bill Shatner loves you. He doesn't have to know you to do so. He's that awesome.

[dlgood.livejournal.com]

Welcome back, and it's good to see you are back around. I'm not a big Star Trek person, but trust me, a good many of our friends on LJ sure are...

[stultiloquentia.livejournal.com]

JOY!!! Emailing you a general "HI HOW ARE YOU?" was actually on my to do list this week, right after "IBARW post", but before "finish the damned Buffy story!" I am so glad you're still alive, although I guess I at least knew that much, because my_daroga posted a picture of you in front of a waterfall (neat).

FIRST OF ALL: I don't want to, like, pressure you to post all your Trek glee here; you are allowed to be shy and confusedly kinky, or kinkily confused, or whatever, but I DO want to state in firm tones that I got to know and like YOU, back in the Golden Days of Buffy, not just your Buffy fic, and I really am interested in reading your journal no matter what your current obsession. And anyway, I'm interested in (though too green to be properly fannish about) Star Trek. Roomie is a huge fan of DS9, and reads all the Voyager femslash she can get her hands on, so I think my eventual topple into Trekkiedom is inevitable.

I want to read your Trek kink. Aw, puleeeeeaze! Come on, this is fandom; in the other window I've got Spike decorated with a bloody lip and one sock, shoving his fingers up Buffy's bum.

And yet, I get you. I've drifted from Buffy and started posting bits of Stargate fic, and my readership (or active commenters, anyway) has dropped like a stone. I've got that one piece of Spuffy porn to unload before I hunker down to work on a multi-chapter (this is terrifying, for me) SG-1 project, but I wonder if anybody's left to read it. Meh.

What's up with me? Oh, gee, le'see. Dreamwidth, baby. I'm helping with documentation and fangirling the devs, wishing I had time to learn perl or at least CSS for srs. damned_colonial's OSCON keynote on women in Open Source gave me an eight-hour grin. I'm so flipping proud of her, them, us.

Speaking of, I'd love to see you there, but I'm cool if you maybe want to wait until it's out of beta. Right now its differences from LJ are mostly in the tiny tweaks and improvements, but oh, they have coolness planned. (Though: I'm probably going to have to split this comment, which I wouldn't have to do, there. Also, this week's new feature: paid journals are searchable! Okay, I shut up now.)

[stultiloquentia.livejournal.com]

I'm also playing with Fanlore, mostly assembling link lists and writing little blurbs for people I fangirl that I upload in bunches. I'm watching nothing much, but reading a ton, and I'm sitting on Dollhouse and HP reviews. And I fell for a particular Stargate AU about as hard as you did for SRB, and have been writing and daydreaming lots about those characters. I think it was I who recced Maya to you, way back when, wasn't it? I wonder if I could do it again with this one. Now that you like SPACE and all. :D I bet, I just bet, that you'd love it.

Hey, space! Have you seen destina's space vid, and killabeez' Dante's Prayer?

What is up. Today in particular, I am facepalming in the internet's general direction for its pictures of Obama, naked, with unicorns, and wailing, "IT'S SO TRUE," at the latest xkcd comic, and desperately researching cabbages, because my CSA gave me four in three weeks.

[gaudy-night.livejournal.com]

*waves*

Um, I have to go back to school soon but will make time to attend the Star Trek convention next week in Vegas. :)

[dreamwaffles.livejournal.com]

I'm just a fish poking my head in to say hi. :D

Not much is up with me. I'm working in a dentist's office. My official title is Sterilization Tech but I variously call myself "the Ianto", "the Jeeves", and "The Cleanup Fairy". The last one is my favorite.

[crazydiamondsue.livejournal.com]

drove all the way down to Portland to see the episode "Amok Time" performed live in a park by some dudes with bad costumes This has now replaced "juggles geese" in my file of "sentences that remind me of Joy."

I have an 11 month old who walks. We are taking a family vacation to Cancun in October (crazy? or crazy fun!) Caza and I decided to mainline the Trek films after the reboot and passed out from boredom halfway through The Motion Picture. I got turned out during "Wrath of Kahn" (no, not the ear slugs. Or Ricardo's plastic abs) and we missed most of it. We haven't tried Search For Spock yet.

Hi, you!

[crazydiamondsue.livejournal.com]

That should be turned on, not turned out. Caza is not pimping me out. Yet.

[tkp.livejournal.com]

I know about teamgaila! I hadn't joined it yet, but I saw the impetus for it's creation, have followed it, and read most the fic on there. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand now I've joined it.

I've been around the kinkmeme. Which, in some ways, has its tentacles in most things going on in fandom, so I find out about stuff. There, uh, may have been discussion there about teamgaila. ;o)

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm so I'm writing like three gaila fics. I love her so goddamn much.

[tkp.livejournal.com]

This is my niece! See how adorable! You should show me yours and we could have a cuteness war. RAR!

Sorry about the guy trouble :o( You should tell me some time. I should email you! I found an icon of the Captain at the table with all the kids that says, "Eat your effing streudle!" And I thought of you.

Snape is always awesome. What prompted this?

hahahah crossover that is awesome.

Oh, A, I'm so dead gone for Trek, it's ridiculous. Why didn't I seem the type?

[redbrickrose.livejournal.com]

Hey, you! Congrats on the new niece!

And yay for new fandoms! Tell us about Star Trek. We'll listen! It seems to be one of the next big things. I know it's all over *my* flist, anyway. *g*

[grey-hunter.livejournal.com]

And now I demand you post links to the ones you've written anonymously! :D :D :D

heh I've actually been seeing you around a lot more since that kink meme started than before. :P

[tkp.livejournal.com]

I agree they are amazing!

I'll do DW eventually. I just, ugh, have to DO it!

Yeah, I got this idea to do genderbending, with Angel being the one turning into a girl, since I've only ever seen people do Spike. And then I was like, what if Spike got all hot from girl!Angel and Angel got hot from it because he started thinking about Buffy, and got Spike to do him like he did Buffy! And then I was like, wouldn't it be so heartwrenching and bittersweet if then Angel did Spike like he did Buffy and Spike knew he might not be talking to him (but might be after all) when he said I love you?

And then I went . . .uh, this already happened in my head. And Lynne wrote it, even if there was no girl!Angel.

Yay Stoney! I'm glad you had fun!

[tkp.livejournal.com]

Ooooh, congrats on graduating!

Who are you rps'ing?

Yeah, thanks for being so awesome on marmalade fish!!! I totally blame you for being super cool.

I have yet to watch HBP. Dude, I didn't know you wrote new H/D; I'll have to read it.

Even though I'm still mostly stalking I feel like I'm totally a Trekkie now. I don't join fandoms any more, apparently; I just silently go crazy over them. That's sort of what I did for H/D!

[tkp.livejournal.com]

Have you written anything? What? Link me! It's good to see you too ;o)

[tkp.livejournal.com]

I haven't seen mine since she became a person. Last time I saw her she was a squishy in s-i-l's belly! Glad you got to see yours!

Oooh, any good books?

Yeah, I think it's best to just say what you're feeling. I just get so tied up. I'm unwilling to speak unless to say something that will impress the whole room.