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The Fic That Ate My Brain.
B. I use words to get the thoughts out of my head. They just keep coming and coming and don't make sense or feel real--sometimes I don't feel like a real person--until I write it down. So if I've got a story or idea, I need to write it just so it will go away. But that means if I write something down, it will go away, like Dumbledore's memories into a Pensieve. So in general I hate writing outlines/plans for stories/essays, for fear I'll waste the idea of what I want to write in the form of an outline instead of a story, and so never be able to write the story itself. How bout you? Like writing outlines? Thoughts, notes, ideas? Hate it? Why?
R. On another level, I sometimes feel like saying something will make something real, which will of course jinx it and make it unreal. For instance, I don't like to talk about it with my friends if I'm sort of seeing someone, trying to get a job, trying to publish a story. I always want to wait until I've already done it, or until after I've failed, and say, "look, see?" The thing is, it's not about needing to be successful; it's about hating the limbo, but being able to stand it better if I don't admit it's limbo and just wait for the outcome. The point? Is once again that I don't, or usually don't, talk about, or feel the need to talk about, things I'm writing. If I talk about it something unfinished it makes me a little crazy, because I don't know whether I'm going to finish or like the outcome. If I decide to abandon, or hate the outcome, I failed, but I don't mind talking about it then--it's the interim. This is why I have difficulty discussing and bouncing ideas around with friends/betas. I've rarely tried and when I do it makes me intensely uncomfortable. I know lots of people discuss fic they're writing with betas--why do you do it, how does it affect your process, do you ever feel you lose anything in doing it?
A. The point? The real point this time? I'm writing a fic which is EATING MY BRAIN and I want to talk about it because my BRAIN IS GONE. It's 150,000 words and it just keeps growing. I finally did write a bit of an outline for it, but parts that I think are going to be a measly 5,000 words jump to 30,000 words, and it keeps going ON AND ON. I feel like it's mauling me, seriously. (ETA: I feel the need to add I don't actually want to talk about it in an I'm having trouble with it kind of way, but in an I need to complain about it kind of way, which was really the point of this whole post. That is, IT ATE MY BRAIN AND NOW IT'S GONE. That was the point, really.)
I. And I just wrote slash. It was supposed to be a B/A fic! Okay, it still is, but one slash scene turned into 3, and 2 of them are pairings I never saw myself writing, and the other is turning into those 30,000 words. I don't understand. Stop it, fic, you're hurting me.
N. Now we cut the whining and get on to the important stuff. Which would be more entertaining: dubbing Spartacus so that it has dude after dude standing up and saying, "I'm Charlotte Lennox! No, I'm Charlottle Lennox!" or dubbing Spartacus so that it has dude after dude saying, "I'm MsScribe! And I'm Ms Scribe! In fact, we're all Ms Scribe!"? Who's with me on crossing out all the "Who is John Galt"s graffiteed everywhere and writing "Charlottle Lennox" instead? And lastly: tkp, I know who you are.
S. I saw that Keenau Sandra Bullock movie today. God, it was stupid. Someone explain to me why I thought it might be good?
R. On another level, I sometimes feel like saying something will make something real, which will of course jinx it and make it unreal. For instance, I don't like to talk about it with my friends if I'm sort of seeing someone, trying to get a job, trying to publish a story. I always want to wait until I've already done it, or until after I've failed, and say, "look, see?" The thing is, it's not about needing to be successful; it's about hating the limbo, but being able to stand it better if I don't admit it's limbo and just wait for the outcome. The point? Is once again that I don't, or usually don't, talk about, or feel the need to talk about, things I'm writing. If I talk about it something unfinished it makes me a little crazy, because I don't know whether I'm going to finish or like the outcome. If I decide to abandon, or hate the outcome, I failed, but I don't mind talking about it then--it's the interim. This is why I have difficulty discussing and bouncing ideas around with friends/betas. I've rarely tried and when I do it makes me intensely uncomfortable. I know lots of people discuss fic they're writing with betas--why do you do it, how does it affect your process, do you ever feel you lose anything in doing it?
A. The point? The real point this time? I'm writing a fic which is EATING MY BRAIN and I want to talk about it because my BRAIN IS GONE. It's 150,000 words and it just keeps growing. I finally did write a bit of an outline for it, but parts that I think are going to be a measly 5,000 words jump to 30,000 words, and it keeps going ON AND ON. I feel like it's mauling me, seriously. (ETA: I feel the need to add I don't actually want to talk about it in an I'm having trouble with it kind of way, but in an I need to complain about it kind of way, which was really the point of this whole post. That is, IT ATE MY BRAIN AND NOW IT'S GONE. That was the point, really.)
I. And I just wrote slash. It was supposed to be a B/A fic! Okay, it still is, but one slash scene turned into 3, and 2 of them are pairings I never saw myself writing, and the other is turning into those 30,000 words. I don't understand. Stop it, fic, you're hurting me.
N. Now we cut the whining and get on to the important stuff. Which would be more entertaining: dubbing Spartacus so that it has dude after dude standing up and saying, "I'm Charlotte Lennox! No, I'm Charlottle Lennox!" or dubbing Spartacus so that it has dude after dude saying, "I'm MsScribe! And I'm Ms Scribe! In fact, we're all Ms Scribe!"? Who's with me on crossing out all the "Who is John Galt"s graffiteed everywhere and writing "Charlottle Lennox" instead? And lastly: tkp, I know who you are.
S. I saw that Keenau Sandra Bullock movie today. God, it was stupid. Someone explain to me why I thought it might be good?
no subject
Oh, I talk about my fics. Either to willing listeners online (ha! well, as willing as they can be when I cheerily IM them and say "HI OMG ARE YOU BUSY?" In all caps, because I want them to understand that I am shrieking persuasively.
And when I particularly like something, I speak about it at length to TFMN. The other day I was describing the awkward and upsetting end of a romantic encounter that happens to a teenage character, and when he said "That poor kid," I was all, yay!
I limit who I speak to, though, if only because some people make good listening ears/sounding boards, and some people will seem okay but then will keep saying "Is it done yet? Is it done? When are you updating? Are you ready to update yet? How about now?" And that makes me antsy (and actual talk along the lines of "I want more now; hurry up, you update too slowly" really does make me freeze up a bit).
Oh, and I also "talk about" fics by writing snippets for people in IMs or emails, or showing a bit of prose and saying "does that work?" or "isn't this something!" <------probably a sign that I like that bit far too much, and should cut it right the hell out of the fic *g*
But yeah, some pornier stories are born of someone IMing or in the middle of an IM who basically says "Tell me a story."
Damn it, I was going to see that movie, and I was so excited for it to be good! Okay, not really. The previews made me snigger, and I thought it would probably suck. But maybe if it's airing some night on completely free tv (alas, we are cable-less) then I'll check out part of it. But I wanted to make you feel better. (omg, did it work?)
no subject
Yeah! When I think about outlines I think about saying what's coming next, but it seems to me it's really important to keep track of things you've already said. It's surprising how many little inconsistencies can flower in a longer fic.
I limit who I speak to, though, if only because some people make good listening ears/sounding boards
It's possible that the few people I've tried to talk to about my stuff weren't that great listeners. The thing is, I LOVE to listen. And when someone says they're having trouble with a story, in the past I've been like: OMG why didn't you tell me, maybe I can help you! But as for myself I never want to go to anybody!
and actual talk along the lines of "I want more now; hurry up, you update too slowly" really does make me freeze up a bit
I really love the, "this is great, can't wait to see where you're going!" and really hate the "where's the next part????" The former spurs me on to write more; the latter yeah, makes me freeze.
Oh, and I also "talk about" fics by writing snippets for people in IMs or emails,
See, to me, that just feels like undressing in front of someone.
Totally feel better about Lake House! The thing was, I still kinda like the premise. It's goofy but I prefer goofy to the more rote/standard plots. But I didn't feel either of the characters was particularly interesting or original, and I didn't see why their love was so...dun dun dun, TIMELESS.