Because stultiloquentia told us to.

[lettered]

stultiloquentia's doing an easy recipe meme. Here's kyriacastle with here own recipes and why we should just do whatever Sulti says.

And here are my recipes! I transcribed almost all of them from memory; that is how easy they are.

Breakfast

Bagel-Apple-Cheese Thing

I've been having this every day for breakfast for like, two weeks.

Bagel
butter
cinnamon sugar
apple slices
weak white cheese slices

Cut the bagel in half, spread butter on both inside sides, sprinkle cinnamon sugar on top (like you're making cinnamon toast). Place apple slices over cinnamon, and cheese slices over apple. Set oven to "broil" and cook until cheese is melty and starting to get golden spots, and cinnamon sugar is melted into butter (only a few minutes. Great in toaster ovens). EAT.

Kolaches

extra buttery pillsbury croissant dough
mini cocktail weiners

Cut dough in strips and wrap up the weiners. Cook according to croissant recipe. If you haven't done this yet you need to now. EAT IT.

Sausage balls

2 C Bisquick
12 oz cheddar cheese (sharp is best, or you can do half sharp, half regular)
1 tube of that gross breakfast sausage, like Jimmy Dean (I do half regular and half spicy. The spicy is too spicy for me and the regular too bland. Experiment on your own.)

Mix (if you have a dough attachment on a mixer, this is best. Otherwise you'll have to use your hands). Roll into cookie-sized balls. Bake at 400 for 10-15 minutes (12 for me.) Then you EAT THEM.

Cold salad-y things

Almost Houston's Couscous

Houston's Restaurant has the best Couscous EVAR.

couscous
peanuts (or pine nuts, toasted)
golden raisins (or dried cherries. Mmm, dried cherries)
cherry tomatoes (quartered)
green onions (diced)
balsamic vinegar (about a tablespoon? I dunno. Eyeball it!)
lemon juice (about one lemon's worth)

Cook couscous according to directions. Put in fridge until cold. Mix in the rest, EAT cold.

Rachel Ray's bean salad

It's Rachel Ray. So you could find it and do it easy anyway. But I used to make this salad like, once a week.

green beans
red onion (diced)
cherry tomatoes (halved)
lemon juice
olive oil
salt and pepper to taste

Blanch green beans. Add onion and tomatoes. Drizzle oil and lemon juice (eyeball it), add salt and pepper, mix. EAT cold.

Waldorf Salad

Everyone knows this one, right?

sour cream
brown sugar
apples (squared)
walnuts (toasted)
celery (cut up)
raisins (or dried cherries)
optional: white onion (so finally diced you can barely see it)
optional: cheddar cheese (in squares. I don't usually do this.)

Mix sour cream and brown sugar until no longer grainy. Mix in the rest. EAT.

sweet stuff with peanutbutter

Puppy Chow (For you, not dogs. Is bad for dogs.)

I made this for seraphcelene when I visited, and for kita0610's family. Maze dared Fod to eat just one and somehow she managed; I know not how.

1 box Chex cereal
1 bag powdered sugar
12 oz. peanutbutter
24 oz. chocolate chips

Melt chocolate chips in microwave. Add peanutbutter and mix until smooth. Add Chex and gently mix until all is chocolatey. Get a plastic bag (you can use grocery bags if they are clean, but I use ziplock) and add a cup or two of powdered sugar, then a cup or two of the chocolatey Chex. Seal bag or tightly close with fist. Shake! Until individual chex pieces are dusted with sugar. Continue with sugar and Chex until all used up! You might need to go through several bags if they get sticky and stuff. Keep in sealed container for a long long time! But you shouldn't because you'll be DEVOURING them.

Peanutbutter Rice Krispie Treats (SO MUCH BETTER than that marshmellow crap)

treats:

7 cups Krispies!
1 cup sugar
1 cup corn syrup
1 1/2 cup peanutbutter

Heat sugar and corn syrup on stove until sugar dissolves. Take off heat, add peanutbutter. Pour over Krispies and mix. Grease 13x9 pan and push Krisies into it. Wait 'til it cools a little before putting on frosting.

frosting:
24 oz chocolate chips
12 oz butterscotch chips

Heat in microwave and mix until smooth. Careful, chocolate burns fast. Spread over treats.

These keep for a couple hours out of the fridge. Once in the fridge, they get really hard, and you have to wait for them to heat up a little before they're really enjoyable to EAT again.

No-bake cookies

2 C sugar
1/2 C milk
1/2 C cocoa (tried this with dark cocoa powder once and it was EVEN BETTER.)
1/2 C butter
3/4 C peanutbutter
3 C oatmeal (quick cook)

Bring sugar, milk, cocoa, and butter to a boil, boil for one minute. Take off heat and add peanutbutter, mix until smooth. Add oatmeal, mix. Lay out wax paper and spoon out daubs of chocolate oatmeal stuff evenly spaced. Hardens in open air and is easily removable from paper so you can EAT THEM. These suckers are hard to store because they crumble. I usually just put the wax paper on a cookie sheet, then stick the whole cookie sheet in the fridge uncovered.

dips

Apple Dip (Dessert)

cream cheese
caramel sauce or bunches of caramels you can melt, which is better
chopped peanuts
apple slices.

Spread cream cheese over a plate. Pour caramel sauce over cheese. Sprinkle peanuts to cover top. Dip apples and EAT. Best thing EVAR.

Benedictine (Veggie or cracker or ANYTHING dip)

1 package cream cheese
1/4 C sour cream (big dollop)
1 T mayonnaise (lil dollop)
1/2 cucumber (peeled. And seedless is better.)
1/4 white onion
green food coloring (I found this recipe that said NOT OPTIONAL)
salt (to taste. Probably a bit more than a pinch, though. A recipe said 1/4 teaspoon)

Mix cheese, cream, and mayo. Grate cuke and onion into mixture (you know, so it's all pulpy and wet). Mix. Add salt to taste. I add the food coloring because it looks really gray and gross, and it looks nice in the middle of a veggie plate. Don't put in too much color or it'll look like an alien landing. I did that once. EAT with celery, carrots, breadsticks, wheat thins, Ritz, spoon.

Meatball Sauce

1 C ketchup
1/3 C grape jelly (I know it sounds disgusting.)
lemon juice, optional.

Mix. I use frozen meatballs. I know. BUT OMG IT'S GOOD EAT NOW.

One day I shall teach you to make rumballs, young padawans. And Bernaise sauce.

Comments

[femmenerd.livejournal.com]

Meanwhile, I am analyzing Stulti as a text. I think this process would be fueled by peanut butter rice krispie treats, but alas, I have all of those ingredients EXCEPT for rice krispies.

[tkp.livejournal.com]

What do you have so far on Stulti as a text? Usually I just pantyfan her into oblivion.

I like Rice Krispies. However last time I got these knock offs that were just as good. Don't tell Snap or Crackle. But you can tell Pop; he's an ass.

I love that icon. My_daroga and I were discussing how you can make us feel the love even when we have never felt it previously, and RG may have gotten mentioned.

[femmenerd.livejournal.com]

Well, I'm five pages in and I have yet to even analyze her fic. I've talked about her TAGS, website, fanfic awards, lj user interests, and um, other stuff all in relation to some lit theory about "the author function" as a criterion of value. It's a trip, man. I'm so glad she's down with this.

I love this icon too - I think it's one of the default icons that's had the most longevity with me. And you guys were talking about me! As an instigator of LOVE no less. Excellent.

[tkp.livejournal.com]

Zounds, you were serious. That . . . is a paper I would pay money to read.

Yes, but discussion of your instigation of love was riddle with exclamations of "Curses!" and "damn her!" as we shook our fists at the skies, for we have not time for the more! new! shiny! you force on us. We come to you all innocent and unknowing to feed obsessions already plaguing us and then you thrust upon us more obsession. Is it fair? I ask you.

[tkp.livejournal.com]

I meant riddled. Or possibly rife.

[femmenerd.livejournal.com]

Haha. Yes, I am totally serious. Yet also sitting here bemused as I actually do it. And you will not have to pay money to read it. Providing I don't hate it, I will let you read it when I am finished.

And is it fair, I ask YOU that the WORLD keeps providing me with new things to obsess about (publicly)?

[tkp.livejournal.com]

AwesomeI'msohappy pls don't be forgetting to be sending, yes? Though if you hate it, I understand. BUT HOW COULD YOU HATE ANYTHING ABOUT STULTI? This is so exciting.

It's funny that you add the publicly as I go through obsessions like water but I tend not to post about them. I think I don't want to go through all the trouble and drama of finding people to talk about it with. Building a flist for Buffyverse was apparently traumatic for me? I don't know. Oh, speaking of new and private obsessions, was it you who said you had a vid of Pam/Jim on your You!Tube favorites? OMG I LOVE THEM SO HARD and for a while was reading the trashiest fic where they had lots and lots of secks.

[femmenerd.livejournal.com]

Well, lately I am sparing in my friending (as my flist is too much for me already) and I tend to friend people who share multiple obsessions with me or similar points of view/other interests. Like people whose journals I'm interested in regardless of what they're talking about.

To continue with my (apparent) aiding and abetting: [my jim/pam tag on del.icio.us. None of which are trashy (even though several involve phone sex). I mean, you HAVE read "Warning Labels," right? It's annakovsky and honey_wheeler (who is one of my favorites in HP and FNL as well) and uh, some other people who are also good.

Speaking of annakovsky, here is her jim/pam tag on del.icio.us, which is much more extensive than mine: http://del.icio.us/annakovsky/Jim/Pam

Also?



*g*

[tkp.livejournal.com]

No. I haven't read anything but crap, really. It was a week's worth of late at night, need a fix type things where I wasn't even bothering to look for quality. I thought I was turning into someone who wouldn't even fall for new het ships any more since so many of my recent ones have been slash, and was happy to be proven wrong.

Thanks so much for the links! And the vid--omg it makes me so happy. I love them so much.

[femmenerd.livejournal.com]

Well, I feel like a dork because I KEEP falling for canon het ships of late (John/Aeryn, Ron/Hermione, Jim/Pam, etc.). Except, you know, that thing where I generally don't get embarrassed of the things I like all that much.

And you're welcome. I'm serious about "Warning Labels" and annakovsky's other Office fic.

[stultiloquentia.livejournal.com]

Aieee! Roomie and I just hit "Icarus Abides" last night. I am so predictable in my shipping. I'm going to be all over the Aeryn/Moya!John.

[tkp.livejournal.com]

There is a Moya!John?

I'm afraid I got really bored with this show. I got into the middle of season three and just got really tired of it. I love the hell out of Aeryn, and Crichton is okay, and I like the way they relate, but most of the time I don't understand what they're feeling or like the things that happen with the 'ship. Maybe I need to give it another go, though.

[stultiloquentia.livejournal.com]

I like the weird. I like the way it says, "Hey, let's do this totally overdone genre plot cliche except do it ONE HUNDRED TIMES WEIRDER!" And sometimes it's a disaster, but, by god, sometimes it soars. It has some of the most beautiful, epic images I've ever seen in sci-fi.

It really helps, I suppose, that I have a mad crush on Ben Browder. I should do a post about why I like the t.v. heroes I do, 'cause Crichton's hitting a truckload of my kinks.

[tkp.livejournal.com]

I LOVE the weirdness, and I love how yeah, they take those stock plots and make them even crazier.

I do not, however, admire what I see as extreme lack of character development in S3, and narrative consistency throughout all of it.

Meanwhile, the only person I have a crush on is Claudia Black. Okay, sometimes Crais because he's a bitch. AND SCORPIUS OF COURSE.

Browder annoys me. For a while I was totally over it because Crichton was broody and had an evil chip thing and did the crazy I DON'T CARE IF I'M GOING TO FUCKING DIE, I'M GOING TO SAVE THE WORLD *AND* THE KITTENS KTHXBAI. But when I stopped neither Crichton seemed to be doing ANYTHING. humph.

[stultiloquentia.livejournal.com]

I'm 2/3 through S3. I've enjoyed it, but I was lulled by all the snogging. I'll let you know if anything redeeming happens in the back third, character- and narrative-wise.

Of the pack of them, Scorpius most consistently fills me with glee.

[tkp.livejournal.com]

Oh, I get what you mean by Moya!john. As opposed to Talon john. Since someone SPOILED me, I mean.

[tkp.livejournal.com]

Um, not you. I think I probably spoiled myself when I went on Wikipedia after S1 to find out whether Stark would come back. But then he did and I find him lame. I am so negative.

[femmenerd.livejournal.com]

Dude. J/A was a ship that was MADE FOR US. \o/

[stultiloquentia.livejournal.com]

Yes. Also, Ben Browder has a body that was MADE FOR ME TO OBJECTIFY.

Well, that's inaccurate, really, but it was fun to say. I read the best description of him the other day: British stage-trained sci-fi fanboy PERPETUALLY startled that he appears to be in the body of an all-American football hero.

What is true is that CB makes a mess of my straight and then BB cleans it all up again.

[femmenerd.livejournal.com]

British stage-trained sci-fi fanboy PERPETUALLY startled that he appears to be in the body of an all-American football hero.

Haha! That's excellent. HIS ASS, omg, HIS ASS.

What is true is that CB makes a mess of my straight and then BB cleans it all up again.

Hee!

[stultiloquentia.livejournal.com]

It is a truly outstanding ass.

[tkp.livejournal.com]

British stage-trained sci-fi fanboy PERPETUALLY startled that he appears to be in the body of an all-American football hero.

That's something I really like about him, but have difficultly lusting over since I don't like the bodies of all-American football heroes.

[stultiloquentia.livejournal.com]

TAGS, website, fanfic awards, lj user interests...

Dear Lord. Why do I suddenly have a strong urge to vacuum?

[femmenerd.livejournal.com]

Hee!

[stultiloquentia.livejournal.com]

I am cutting and pasting ALL of these! Woohoo!

[tkp.livejournal.com]

They are so good.

[diachrony.livejournal.com]

Oh my.

I'm pretending I'm not saving these recipes because they are almost all inexcusable. Nutrition-wise, I mean. Shame.

::Drools quietly::

[tkp.livejournal.com]

new . . . trition . . .? What's that?

HAY I PUT SALADS ON THAR WUT MOAR DO U WANT! ;o) Oh, for the waldorf salad, use splenda brown sugar and non-fat sour cream, and have it for dessert. It's sweet so it makes a good dessert, but healthy enough that if you're doing the healthy thing it's an ok treat to have.

[kyriacarlisle.livejournal.com]

I was eating a close relative of that apple-and-cheese sandwich (apple and cheese in pita, all toasted and melty) for lunch for a couple of weeks this fall...MMMM.

And I'm saving the couscous recipe to try very soon!

[tkp.livejournal.com]

Apple and cheese is ALWAYS good.

Houston's couscous makes me feel like couscous should *always* be served cold. Oh, I should've put parsley on there too. Or mint, which sounds weird, but makes it all fresh and Mediterranean, you know.

[kyriacarlisle.livejournal.com]

I am a big fan of adding extra things at the end to make recipes all fresh and interesting (if not Mediterranean, exactly). I just hit the dinnertime hazelnut/currant/orange bulghur with chili powder, and I declare it a success!

[tkp.livejournal.com]

HAZELNUT BULGHUR? Marry me.

Chili powder goes on awesomesauce, obviously.

[kyriacarlisle.livejournal.com]

It is fantastic!

Actual recipe (serves 4-6, although, fair warning, it is so wonderful that I made 1/3 of a batch and then ate it all myself):

Finely chop a medium-sized onion; melt 3 T. butter + a bit of olive oil in a saucepan that has a tight-fitting lid. Saute for 2-3 minutes, until softened and translucent. Add 1 3/4 c. bulghur and 1/4 t. allspice. Saute about 2 minutes more (obv., stop if something starts to burn).

Add 3 cups + 2 T. broth or water and bring to a boil. Add 1/4 c. currants and a handful of hazelnuts (chopped or not, your choice). Cover, lower heat, and cook 15-20 minutes, until the water is absorbed.

Remove from heat and mix in 1/2 t. orange zest (I used most of the rind of a satsuma, because I like zesting things, and it was mmmmmmm luscious) and a pinch of chili powder. Stick a paper towel between the pot and the lid and let it sit for 5-10 minutes more.

Stir up and gobble.

Also, I should say that this started life as the NYTimes' bulghur with chestnuts and tangerine brown butter, but I hate chestnuts, and I'm too lazy to fuss with sauces (and, um, I read the recipe wrong the first time).

[tkp.livejournal.com]

I like chestnuts, but find them difficult to work with, and hazelnuts are my FAVORITE nut. So thanks for this recipe! I'll definitely try it some time.

And I like to zest things too. I hope I get a new microplane for Xmas from my friend. *crosses fingers*

[alleynyc.livejournal.com]

Here's one to go with your hotdog one.

Buy a 'round' of gouda or smoked gouda. Cut in half horizontally (so you end up with two circles about 1/2 thick.

Open can of Pillsbury crescent rolls and unroll dough. Divide along center of roll dividing line (it's clear when you see it). Wrap each round of cheese in one of the halves of dough. Bake according to crescent roll package directions.

Best treat ever. But it does go quickly so it can get expensive LOL.