Hey fic, how are you?

That first line meme is going around. I never think much or care about first lines, but I went and looked at mine anyway, and they sucked. Then I thought, even though I suck at it, I should dig up first lines I loved from other fics--and came up with exactly nil. It's not that you folks haven't written some great first lines; I'm sure you have. It's just that I, personally, dislike first lines.

I just wanna be inside the story already; I don't actually like the slow get-to-know-you dance; the "do I like you/do you like me?" kind of thing. I hate it in real life too. I hate meeting people and I hate, "So what do you do? Are you married? Where did you go to school?" I even hate the, "How are you?" part of conversations, because the part of a conversation where you get to talking about how someone really is isn't until the meaty part of a conversation, which is often in the middle. (Even if someone answers, "How are you?" with "Dismal!" the part that's interesting is why.)

( Even the first parts of posts are boring. )