forget your Unified Theory of Everything

What: A Jossverse poem, free verse, very very short.
Why: for stultiloquentia, because she always rocks my world.
A/N: I suck at poetry. But it's fun to try.

( Prerequisites )

It's all about how they look!

Either this stuff gets off my chest, ( or I make accomodation for my new cleavage. )

And now for something completely different. Or okay, tangentially related, but not really.

I want to do a Bad!fic Ficathon. Actually, I want to do a Reclaim Fandom From Its Percieved Takeover By What You Percieve As Bad!fic Ficathon. RFFIPTBWYPABF!F for short. It's not about writing bad!fic, though that would be fun. It's taking an idea that you personally think can only end in bad (start with bad! *snorfle* I'm so clever!) and making it good.

Because I actually don't believe there are bad ideas, only bad writers and bad execution. I want to see writers:
a. write something they've seen and sneered at, or thought couldn't be done well, but then DO IT and DO IT WELL,
b. write utter crack, UTTERLY CRACKTASTIC CRACK, and make it wonderful and beautiful and something everyone would love reading, and not through the powers of Xander's Magic Cock, but through powerful writing and plot and thought even if Angel IS wearing a toutou as Spike foresaw in "In The Dark," or
c. write some other thing that takes ideas and methods that you consider "bad" and uses them for good.

(On that last one: for instance, I'm dying to write this fic where Spike gets trapped in an AU where he's a princess and beefy Angel is beating him black and blue with omg, alliteration, where the Real Angel is forced to go save Spike. Of course, the Real Angel would only point and laugh and keep Spikella on picture-in-picture with a hockey game, and point and laugh some more while drinking otter blood in a leather chair. BUT OTTER BLOOD IS NOT THE POINT! I WOULD MAKE ANGEL SAVE THE PRINCESS AND I WOULD MAKE IT GOOD!)

So, um, anyone interested?

ETA: I should add, I don't enter ficathons. I can't. It's beyond me. But I would run one. How hypocritical and perverse is that?

I feel the need to point out that this isn't in response to anything--people are always trimming or locking or skipping or what have you.  Actually, it is in response to something.  3 things, actually.

1. imnotacommittee informed me that there's such a thing as a rich text editor for when you post. I had no idea.  Beats the shit out of typing out all that freakin' code, and made me wonder what other little treats lj has I'm too lazy to suss out.
2. I'm going to Austin tomorrow and will be gone for two days.  I'm wondering what'll be up with the ole flist when I get back and how I'll ever manage.
3. Which really just made me wonder how everyone manages, and how all this crap works, and while everyone is always discussing it I'm interested in having stuff to discuss with everyone on my lj when I get back.  Yay!

Look at the color of this text, yay!

P.S. I've discovered I hate the rich text thing.  I've discovered that this post contains massive frippery and the title of the cut is misleading.  It's much more difficult to edit such a thing when one is using this do-hickey.  I throw up my hands I say, I throw up my...ouch, ceiling.  And ew, throw up.

G. TKP: I shaved my arm-pits.
TKMom: Cool. Let me see.
TKP: Look. (hooks index in t-shirt sleeve to reveal self.)
TKMom: They're so sparkly!
R. Got 4th rejection letter. Am waiting to get rejected to 3 more grad schools. Go me.
A. Writing month! It's a time to discuss how we write, why we write, what we write. DISCUSSION, it squeezes me up out of defjection from rejection (marvel at my rhyme) like a tight hug or one of those stress things, the ones you squeeze and have to keep grabbing hand over fist lest they slip from your hands entirely. It's about being constructive, and possibly positive, and gazing at our navels with shining, dewy eyes and wondering words that tumble from our mazed-parted lips in the form of, "I'm beautiful; I'm really beautiful!"

V. Er, the point of this post...( Word emphasis in fic. Italics? Bold?--or is it bolded? *Astrisks*, /slashes/, _these thingies_, CAPSLOCK, etc in text, how I use them and why do you? )
Anyway, I've seen excellent authors I admire use many of these styles, especially boldface, CAPSLOCK, and *astrisks*. No matter who's writing it, it throws me out of the text. But that's me, my opinion, my way of writing, and my way of reading. What're your thoughts on the matter? How do you use these tools, if you use them? What do you think when you see them in text?
Y. "Cheekbones so unreal they must be sparkled with god-dust"...The lovechild of Kiera Knightly and James Marsters could split atoms with his cheekbones.
!. Mmm. Brains.

I've got questions about authorial intent...

( But I can't handle words as big as authorial, so you won't see that in here. Mostly, I want to know how you approach the table/desk/really comfy chair/bed when you write. )

Anybody got an opinion on this type of thing?

*puts on tea* *gets you a cozie*

Say hello to my friend, imnotacommittee. I knew her way back when when I wankishly had another name and was writing The Sound of Music fanfic. She is funny, clever, risque, unfailingly kind, prone to puzzle over bad!fic with good!fic writers, prone to coming up with incredibly witty and sometimes naughty explanations and fillers for the quirks of canon, sparkling, adventurous, obsessive, a fan of Star Wars, someone you could talk to for hours and hours about the hangnail on your pinky, cute, and just plain cool. She hasn't watched BtVS/AtS, but one day I'm going to convert her (only she doesn't know it yet).

These days she's into Firefly. She just wrote a fic in the 'verse called Left Behind. It's post-Serenity ensemble gen, and she handles all the characters' voices well. It's a good solid fic that may tug at your heart or bring a tiny smile to your face. She's just informed me she's giving up everything Firefly for Lent, because she apparently has more self-control than I could ever manage. She might not respond within the next 40 days, but she'll get to you eventually.

Now I'm going to say what someone I admire very much said about me once: new people should be encouraged. Go encourage.

S. Hello fandom! *waves enthusiastically*
P. Whoever recced my fic 5 Ways NFA Probably Didn't End at BBF has my thanks. So, thanks.
A. Go read a2zmom's fic, Faithless. It's B/A/(F), or possibly B=F/A, or possibly A+F=-B, the sum of which equals hot.
N. entrenous88 is writing Buffy/Connor; it's like she read my mind, ripped all the pages out, made them into tiny sea-worthy boats, said, "I can do better!" and did, right here.
D. crazydiamondsue has more Xander shaped love, which you should all go read, because Xander is an unsung hero, except for all the times we get up and sing about him at the top of our lungs with bawdy lyrics and possibly spit on the audience, which should really be attempted more often.
E. viciouswishes is asking about dating fanfic on archives, because internet dating is really all the rage now, and spiralleds is asking about writing longer fics because once, two guys were pissing off the side of Golden Gate Bridge, comparing, you know, as guys are wont to do, until one of them remarked, "boy, is this water cold!" And the other had to throw in, "and deep!" because length matters.
X. What was I going to say again? Oh, if your names is Ares, l_aurens or imnotacommittee I owe you emails, and will stare at the sendy button blankly for possibly weeks until I get back to you. But strike back at you I will. They call me Empire at the office. They also call me exceedingly cheesy. Plus, there is no office.
!. ( And a meme! )
FIN
(Like Riley, or possibly Flipper)
edited because I'm dumbasstastic.

Title: Five Ways NFA Probably Didn’t End
Rating: NC-17, I think.
Warnings: Sex, violence, sex and violence, weirdly kinky in a place or two. Er, and some parts may be sad.
Length: 5 parts, at 2,000+ words each? But you can read it in one sitting, honestly.
Disclaimer: Warren Zevon, I don’t know how it happened. "Dollfull" is a word coined by Thomas Pynchon.
Summary: Ensemble, with focus on Angel, Connor, Spike, Buffy, and Dawn.
A/N: This is another one of those nutty fics from me. So, even though I'm all nervous and stuff, entirely open to constructive criticism. Not sure some of the things works in here.

On that note, thanks to a2zmom for giving it a couple reads through and the firm nod of "yes." I love you for that. Oh, and for putting up with my indecisiveness. And...other things ;o)


Parts 1-3 are HERE

( Five Ways NFA Probably Didn't End, parts 4-5 )

chrisleeoctaves tagged me.

( Because it runs in the blood. My brother once sold his soul to my other brother for a Baby Ruth bar. There was a contract and everything. )